No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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