im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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