yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The power of my boobs compel you
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize