I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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