All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Randomize
