You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Randomize