Dual....:-)
Best friends brother. Beat that.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
