i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
