he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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