why didn't you poke me back
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
