About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize