ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
