you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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