That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
