Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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