is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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