My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Less talking, more tequila
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
