Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize