I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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