what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
