I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
