So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
