I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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