dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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