I don't usually arrange sex via text message
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
