belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
