Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
