i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
