i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
