We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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