i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
