I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Randomize
