if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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