ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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