So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
