I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
