They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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