Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize