On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Pants are for mortals
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
