Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Yo dont text me then not text me
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
