"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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