Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize