Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
