she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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