You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
This girl is more easily done than said...
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
