super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize