Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
