I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Bring me that man meat
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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