She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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