he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize