I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
