my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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