So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
